Words of Encouragement to the New Military Spouse

This is for the brand new military spouse: I see you and was once where you are now.

If it seems overwhelming or scary, I get it.

You are allowed to feel all the feelings, good and bad, about becoming a military spouse.

You CAN do this! And it is also absolutely ok to have worries!

No matter what point of your relationship you are in, one thing that remains the same across the board?

You are joining a huge force of strong military members and spouses who are in the trenches with you.

Just for you…

This life can be overwhelming!

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If you married into the military life…

This is the situation I found myself in. I started my relationship with Chase while he was halfway through the ROTC program at USU.

I will be honest with you – I did some serious thinking as to whether or not I would be up for military life.

He had a previous commitment, and I wasn’t sure if that life would really be “for me”.

I had the chance to say no, but I didn’t because honestly my love for him is stronger than my indecisiveness towards the military.

Now knowing that, I absolutely see your struggle! And I’m here to say that I have made some of the best friends and learned some of the most important lessons while on this journey.

Marrying in means you jump into a world that might be completely foreign to you.

There are countless acronyms (here are some to get you started) your spouse already knows. Now you need to learn how rank works, you need a military ID, and so much more.

But you can do this.

I guarantee they want you to feel comfortable with this new world you’re entering into. Communicate your feelings to them and ask them for help and guidance!

If your spouse joins after you’ve been together awhile…

Before I get too far into this, I am assuming this was a joint decision. If not, please please make sure you are BOTH ready for what is coming!

With that out of the way, you know your relationship best.

Military life doesn’t always cause a dramatic change in lifestyle…but it usually does. Just know that you have your person along for the ride with you. You are NOT alone!

Lean on your spouse. Communicate any frustrations, worries, and doubts so that everything is on the table.

And don’t forget to notice the great stuff too! There are so many benefits (financially and otherwise) that come with being a military dependent.

Holding resentment for your spouse because of the job they hold is a difficult position to be in.

Joining this life can strengthen your relationship SO much. Let it!

This can be such a fun and adventurous experience if you have the right mindset.

So here’s my two cents…

It won’t take one day. But there will come a day where it doesn’t feel so new anymore.

It may seem like a lot at one time, and that’s ok. You don’t have to know it all. Your spouse probably doesn’t either!

There will be hard times that come from being a new military spouse. I’m not going to sugarcoat it. However, there will also be incredible times.

Remember – your relationship is your number one priority. If it truly feels as though the military is getting between you, sit down and chat about your options concerning their job.

Being a military spouse is like nothing else. You make lifelong friends from all over the world, you have unique and fun experiences, and you have a community of mil spouses wherever you go!

For those moments when you just feel alone, isolated, and in survival mode, this book is an amazing resource!

As a review says, “The words she wrote made me feel not so alone and comforted in knowing I am NOT alone in the situation. I will cherish these poems and read them again and again.”

I hope you find peace, excitement, and joy as you embark on this rollercoaster of a journey! 🤍

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